You would be surprised to know all the reasons people list as their excuse for cheating on their partners. Obviously none of them is good since there is no good reason to cheat on the person who you are with but we can say that some reasons can make sense. In any case, once the Private Investigator you have hired knocks on your door with the evidence of the betrayal probably your world would come crushing down. If you decide to forgive your partner there are certain things you need to consider.
Understand Why Your Partner Cheated
The most important thing is to understand why your partner has cheated on you. Often it’s not about the sex but there is a deeper reason behind that behavior. If you are able to detect the problem, you might understand where your partner is coming from. In order for both of you to move on your partner must understand that they need to stop communicating with their lover. There is no point in trying to fix things if they can still be tempted to go back to committing a sin. Finding out that your partner has been unfaithful is dreadful so it is normal if you need more time to go over that. Give yourself all the time you need, don’t try to rush things. When you feel you are ready, talk about the affair. Don’t go into details but make sure you know enough things that might make you understand. In time you might be able to forget. Be aware that forgiveness doesn’t come immediately so be patient. You might even consider asking for help from a professional, as talking to a person who is more objective could be beneficial.
You can also discuss which behavior is acceptable and which is not. If you set some boundaries and your partner understands what type of situations they need to avoid, then it will be easier to prevent similar things from happening in future. In addition you should encourage your partner to be more open with you and discuss everything they have in mind. Ask them to tell you where they will be during the day and slowly start rebuilding the trust.
Respect Each Others Needs
This period is difficult for both, so be respectful of each others needs. Start doing things you did when you first started dating and appreciate each other. You should also agree to certain behavior and make your partner promise that this affair will never happen again. In addition you should discuss the possible consequences if the affair does happen again. That will stay in their mind as a warning and they will probably think twice before making the same mistake.
If you have tried all these things and nothing has worked, then it might be time to move on. Don’t force the relationship just because you still have feelings. Sometimes it is better to be alone, rather than be with someone who doesn’t care about your feelings.